Monday, August 29, 2011

burglarized

"...in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world." -John 16:33

Sometimes it takes something bad happening to remind us of what is good. We got robbed. But let me back up.

Last Wednesday was a bad day for me. Nothing bad happened I was just in the worst mood ever. It felt like demons were just tearing away at me. The enemy was attacking and he was winning. I felt weak. My faith was weak. For whatever reason I just felt like God had abandoned me. I as angry, frustrated, agitated and depressed. Nothing was going my way. I blamed God. I said things I shouldn't have to God. It was a horrible day. That night I tried to pray and ask for forgiveness. I know God forgives us but I sincerely didn't feel like a deserved to be forgiven. I felt horrible.

The next day I was determined for things to be better. They really couldn't have gotten worse. I had to go to work and about two hours into my shift my husband called. His voice was shaky. "Don't panic" he said, "just stay calm"
Immediately I began to shake as tears welled up in my eyes. Was he hurt? Was our son hurt? My parents?
"Someone broke into our front door and robbed us."
I think I was in shock and I just wanted to bust out crying. I went home to find two police cars and policemen in our house. The tv was gone, the labtop, our already messy house was even messier so it was really hard to know what to look for. Four jewerly boxes, two watches, the ipod, the wii, the wii games, the keyboard, the video camera, with the videos of Lukas the night he was born, his first smile, his first words, his first Christmas, birthday. Oh no.
But we still have our son. We still have each other. Material items are all replaceable. Doors can be fixed, things can be bought, memories on tape might be gone but they will always be in my head. This wasn't so bad. Infact as the day went on and the weekend went on, I realized this really wasn't so bad at all. It could have been much worse. They could have taken more. Someone could have been hurt, or killed. What about the families who lost everything in a tornado, or a fire? We are soooo blessed. Beyond blessed.

I started thinking about how when we moved into that house my parents said it was a bad location. Perfect for a burglary, but I have always felt safe there. I felt safe because when we first moved in I asked God to protect us, and I believed that every day and every night God was protecting us. So this begs the question, had God stopped protecting us? Did my lack of faith on Wednesday anger God so he lifted up his protection and allowed us to get robbed? NO. On the contrary. God is always protecting us. I feel my faith is stronger now. I know God forgives me. I know He loves me and I know He is protecting me, my family, my home. Maybe this is a messege from God showing us that anything can happen but as long as we have Him in our heart we can handle it. Maybe this is the enemy trying to further break down my weakness that I showed on Wednesday. Maybe Satan expected me to shout angrily at the Lord asking why, why us? But instead I thank the Lord. I thank Him for all that He has blessed us with. I thank Him for watching over us. I thank Him for being merciful and forgiving us. I thank Him for our wonderful family and all the generous friends who have stepped up to support us through this time. Our God is an Awesome, Amazing, Wonderful, God. His love is bigger than anything satan can hit us with.

As for the robbers, I wish them no harm. I pray that whatever it is causing them to steal might be fixed. If they are hungry I pray they find food. If they need love I pray they find love. If they need warmth I pray they find shelter. If they have an addiction I pray that God my deliver them from that addiction.

Wednesday I felt weak but today I feel strong. The Holy Spirit of the Lord is working inside me. Like I said, sometimes it takes something bad happening to remind us what is good.